Don’t yall have child labor laws in Louisiana? Why are all your employees under the age of 16? Don’t you have adults down there? When the 12 year gate agent couldn’t get me checked in for my flight, I asked to speak to her mother. Yall need some grown ups at your airport.
Hugs,
Donlyn
———————————–
Dear Budget Car Rental:
Please let your employees pick their own clothes. I feel uncomfortable seeing your people in those front-butt enhancing belted navy blue pants and golf shirt tucked in and bunched up their asscracks. I promise you that your valuable customers, like me, would prefer to see employees in normal clothes, not those outdated and unflattering-on-everyone uniforms you force them to wear.
Hugs,
Donlyn
—————————————
Dear DeltaNorthwest:
I hate you with a whitehot hate rivaled only by my hatred for leather seats on 6 hour car ride in the summer in the south. I have not done ANYTHING to you and yet you look for ways to jack with me at every turn. I want a divorce. You disgust me. You don’t have the courage to tell me you don’t want me, you just keep doing shit to me hoping I will break up with you. I am about ready to do just that.
I am not in the logistics business but I have common sense. Common sense tells me that if you have to cancel shipments of people due to your vehicles breaking down, you might want to have a spare vehicle nearby. It is incredible to me that when one plane breaks down, you have no spare.
Which reminds me. Do you know what year it is? It is 2009. Why are you still flying itty bitty propeller planes from the 50’s?
When I purchase a plane ticket to my destination, I expect to ride on an AIRPLANE. I applaud you for your quick thinking yesterday, but I had a ticket for an AIRPLANE, not a freaking Greyhound bus. See above paragraph – why don’t you have a spare airplane somewhere?
Perhaps you should consider stealing some bus drivers and replacing your rude and unfriendly pilots. Even though you shoved us all on a bus to get us to our destination when your airplane wouldn’t work, the jovial, engaging and fun bus driver made things a bit better by being nice and friendly. Perhaps you should have Greyhound drivers train your staff on how to be nice to passengars.
This is the second week in a row you’ve sent me to travel Hell, DeltaNorthwest. I hate you. I hope you get eat up by Southwest Airlines.
No hugs for you,
Donlyn
—————————————–
Dear Highway Department
Would you mind posting a sign stating the main ramp of the interstate is closed BEFORE people get on the damn closed ramp? Seriously, just move the damn sign to the interstate so we can see it BEFORE we get on the ramp. I’m sure the 18 wheeler trying to make a u-turn on the ramp would have appreciated this warning as well.
Idiots.
Hugs,
Donlyn
————————————
Dear Motorola phone makers,
Do you make any phone, at all, whatsoever, that will operate for at least a year before it dies while your customer is on a business trip from hell? And why do my phones always die when I’m out of town and can’t do shit about it? Why can’t they die while I’m at home and can run to the Verizon store and start the long stressful unproductive process of getting the phone fixed or replaced?
You do this on purpose, don’t you? You’re friends with DeltaNorthwest, don’t deny it.
Cards and Letters from the Road
August 6, 2009Dear Alexandria Louisiana Airport:
Don’t yall have child labor laws in Louisiana? Why are all your employees under the age of 16? Don’t you have adults down there? When the 12 year gate agent couldn’t get me checked in for my flight, I asked to speak to her mother. Yall need some grown ups at your airport.
Hugs,
Donlyn
———————————–
Dear Budget Car Rental:
Please let your employees pick their own clothes. I feel uncomfortable seeing your people in those front-butt enhancing belted navy blue pants and golf shirt tucked in and bunched up their asscracks. I promise you that your valuable customers, like me, would prefer to see employees in normal clothes, not those outdated and unflattering-on-everyone uniforms you force them to wear.
Hugs,
Donlyn
—————————————
Dear DeltaNorthwest:
I hate you with a whitehot hate rivaled only by my hatred for leather seats on 6 hour car ride in the summer in the south. I have not done ANYTHING to you and yet you look for ways to jack with me at every turn. I want a divorce. You disgust me. You don’t have the courage to tell me you don’t want me, you just keep doing shit to me hoping I will break up with you. I am about ready to do just that.
I am not in the logistics business but I have common sense. Common sense tells me that if you have to cancel shipments of people due to your vehicles breaking down, you might want to have a spare vehicle nearby. It is incredible to me that when one plane breaks down, you have no spare.
Which reminds me. Do you know what year it is? It is 2009. Why are you still flying itty bitty propeller planes from the 50’s?
When I purchase a plane ticket to my destination, I expect to ride on an AIRPLANE. I applaud you for your quick thinking yesterday, but I had a ticket for an AIRPLANE, not a freaking Greyhound bus. See above paragraph – why don’t you have a spare airplane somewhere?
Perhaps you should consider stealing some bus drivers and replacing your rude and unfriendly pilots. Even though you shoved us all on a bus to get us to our destination when your airplane wouldn’t work, the jovial, engaging and fun bus driver made things a bit better by being nice and friendly. Perhaps you should have Greyhound drivers train your staff on how to be nice to passengars.
This is the second week in a row you’ve sent me to travel Hell, DeltaNorthwest. I hate you. I hope you get eat up by Southwest Airlines.
No hugs for you,
Donlyn
—————————————–
Dear Highway Department
Would you mind posting a sign stating the main ramp of the interstate is closed BEFORE people get on the damn closed ramp? Seriously, just move the damn sign to the interstate so we can see it BEFORE we get on the ramp. I’m sure the 18 wheeler trying to make a u-turn on the ramp would have appreciated this warning as well.
Idiots.
Hugs,
Donlyn
————————————
Dear Motorola phone makers,
Do you make any phone, at all, whatsoever, that will operate for at least a year before it dies while your customer is on a business trip from hell? And why do my phones always die when I’m out of town and can’t do shit about it? Why can’t they die while I’m at home and can run to the Verizon store and start the long stressful unproductive process of getting the phone fixed or replaced?
You do this on purpose, don’t you? You’re friends with DeltaNorthwest, don’t deny it.
No hugs for you,
Donlyn
Tags:Idiots, Scathing commentary
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